Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Friends Become Actual Friends When You Least Expect It
We all have groups of people we hang out with from time to time or even more often than that. We know of each other's occupations, we tend to enjoy doing the same things in our spare time, and we may be known to others outside of the group as a tight-knit group of people, but do we use the word "friend" too loosely?
I read a quote the other day that said that what Americans consider to be a friend is what Europeans consider to be acquaintances. That made me think about all of those I call friends, are they truly just accquaintances? For the most part I don't invest the trust in people to help me through tough times. I've always felt like I can deal with my own problems and that my partner will get me through the tough times. However, this past weekend, my partner was the cause of some seriously tough times.
And so my eyes were opened to how the group of guys that I, in the past, just associated myself with, proved themselves as real friends. I will say that it was because of my trepidations that I held these guys at an arms length for as long as I did. I wasn't sure if a "seventh" member of their group is what they needed or wanted, if my young age was seen as an issue or if they just weren't sure how to take me sometimes.
When things got really rough this weekend, these guys each gave me something that I needed at the exact time that I needed it. Comic relief, opening up his home, a two hour bitch session, a hug, tough-love advice, distracting conversation and truthful answers to my questions were all handed out by these guys in different ways and at different times. For once in my life I feel full and I feel important and I feel safe and cared for (outside of my family).
Maybe one day any one of or all six of those guys will stumble across this blog and read this entry. Or maybe someone else will stumble across it when they are trying to also figure out who their friends are. My advice is to let the walls down and just trust in whomever it is and see what happens. You may just end up with more than you started with.
(Thanks kitties.)
I read a quote the other day that said that what Americans consider to be a friend is what Europeans consider to be acquaintances. That made me think about all of those I call friends, are they truly just accquaintances? For the most part I don't invest the trust in people to help me through tough times. I've always felt like I can deal with my own problems and that my partner will get me through the tough times. However, this past weekend, my partner was the cause of some seriously tough times.
And so my eyes were opened to how the group of guys that I, in the past, just associated myself with, proved themselves as real friends. I will say that it was because of my trepidations that I held these guys at an arms length for as long as I did. I wasn't sure if a "seventh" member of their group is what they needed or wanted, if my young age was seen as an issue or if they just weren't sure how to take me sometimes.
When things got really rough this weekend, these guys each gave me something that I needed at the exact time that I needed it. Comic relief, opening up his home, a two hour bitch session, a hug, tough-love advice, distracting conversation and truthful answers to my questions were all handed out by these guys in different ways and at different times. For once in my life I feel full and I feel important and I feel safe and cared for (outside of my family).
Maybe one day any one of or all six of those guys will stumble across this blog and read this entry. Or maybe someone else will stumble across it when they are trying to also figure out who their friends are. My advice is to let the walls down and just trust in whomever it is and see what happens. You may just end up with more than you started with.
(Thanks kitties.)
// posted by ProudJock Matt @ 7:31 PM 
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